I’m sure most of you have seen the movie ‘The Vow’. This was like any other chick flick. Something that I loved; like many girls do. Now this movie has more of a significant meaning. I have endured a few head injuries within my childhood, from playing sports. Not one, I would’ve ever thought would’ve had life-impacting consequences.
I am that person that looks at happy couples and craves to be like them, I wanted to open my heart in the hope of finding my happily ever after. After finishing with my long-term partner, I decided to put myself back out there. There was this guy on my university course, we had a great connection; we went on many dates, we laughed and I felt like nothing could go wrong.
One day this all changed, like any ‘lad’ they like to joke around. He decided to dragged me off of a sofa despite knowing that I have a past with head injuries. Now at this moment my head felt like it had just been hit by a bus, I presumed my head had banged on the floor but this wasn’t the case. My doctor describe this as a severe shaking of the brain. This in turn caused another concussion.
I presumed it would be like any other. That I would not fully recover but I would still be able to live my life, similar to the previous year. My gap year consisted of six countries; France, United Arab Emirates, Australia, America, Canada and Wales. I was hoping to travel on a full-time basis. This wasn’t the case, the doctor said it would be a minimum of 2 years recovery (very unlikely), maximum being never. Telling my parents that I was very luckily not to be in hospital with permanent brain damage. He added that one more would put me over the edge, my brain was hanging on a string.
This all occurring from a boy messing around, not knowing the consequences to my life. Lets just say we don’t acknowledge each other’s existence, which I can’t speak for him but is perfect for me. I have happily moved on and now back with my long-term partner, I couldn’t be happier.
This one incident has changed my life in many ways unimaginable. The thing is, I constantly live on the edge. It could’ve happened in hockey… Falling over my own feet… Walking into a door… It just happened this way.
My day-to-day life is a constant daily struggle. Impacting those I care about severely. With the help of my doctor, we’ve put together a coping strategy of which is making life easier. Despite all this, the one thing I continue to do is live my life to the fullest. Yes there’s risks to continuing to play sports, but It could happen at any moment. In a car accident when I’m driving to university or the slightest touch to my head. I try to implement the motto; To live your life scared is no life at all, To live your life with passion, adventure and love is a life worth lived.
The reason why ‘The Vow’ resonates with me, is that this situation could happen to me, very easily.
I could wake up and not remember the last 2 years of my life. To look back at the many pictures and videos of the past 2 years, to not remember the amazing memories that I have experienced. To look at my long-term partner and not know who he is. To still think I’m with an ex-boyfriend… My head is dangling on a thread, this is a very real possibility for me.
In turn it could never happen, I may ‘dodge the bullet’ of this worst case scenario. Although struggling on a day-to-day basis; to encounter those extremes would be truly heart-breaking. If it is going to happen it will.
Living my life to the fullest.. Well that’s what I have been doing and will continue to do. That is why I have created this blog. To remember.. To document… and potentially share with my future self. To show if this extreme was to happen, how much I am loved and how much I love life.